This is the best gif you’ll ever see
I’m the man of your dreams, but you couldn’t see that. Or maybe you just didn’t care.
Friends, I’d like you to read the linked article, not because it is good (it is not), but because I would like you to think of it as a checklist.
If you are talking to a person and they check off any of these items, be concerned. If they check multiple items, run away. If they check every item on this list, write an instructive blog post out of it about how to identify misogyny.
If a person:
- Refers to you or other women as “sly”
- Refers to you or other women as “crazy” or “dramatic” (bonus hate-points: this both perpetuates AND conflates mental health stigma and misogyny)
- Devalues your or other women’s humanity based on assumptions about sexual history, i.e., promotes the “female purity” myth
[“Some bad boy’s leftovers,” and “used up,” and ESPECIALLY “Why would I date you? I know where you’ve been, and I hope you’ve been tested” which also perpetuates STD stigma for more bonus hate-points]
- Devalues your or other women’s humanity based on body features that show age, e.g., “wrinkled” and “sagging,” or based on body changes after giving birth, e.g., “You have stretch marks and that c-section scar from pushing out that bad boy’s rugrat”
- Acts with “chivalry” (displays of politeness based only on gender rather than general standards of civility such as holding doors, buying dinner, etc.), and demands ambiguously “sufficient” displays of gratitude in return (usually sexual favors, e.g., “you dodged my goodnight kiss”)
- Ever uses the phrase “I listened to you bitch”
- Says you or other women have “tolerated, no, invited” intimate partner abuse or mistreatment
- Describes manipulations and schemes they “know” you’re trying to pull, and unironically says they know this because they are “not stupid”
[“You [took] the steak home in a doggy bag. I only now realize that it was the ex-boyfriend you were texting all evening, I hope he enjoyed the steak I bought him. By the way that ‘emergency call’ you got after dinner didn’t fool anyone. I’m not stupid” and “I know damn well you’re going to end up cheating on me, and I don’t plan on giving you half my stuff when you do”]
- Presumes to tell you what you want, think, and feel in any context, actually
[“I’ll treat you with respect and you’ll get bored” and “You thought I wasn’t worthy of you”]
I want every red flag you have to go up. I want those red flags waving proud and glorious in the winds of misogyny. The person who says these things hates women.
And then I want you to repeat after me:
wrong leg there buddy
horoscope app: today u gonna #stunt on these hoes
me: damn….das tru
The Earth is super important because, ya know, sustaining life and all. Every little bit matters, don’t think it doesn’t! (That’s how we got into this mess 😷) #earthday
"Maybe a greater thing will happen. Maybe all will see. Maybe our love will catch like fire, as it burns through me."